We’ve all had that moment when we got declined or rejected, but the only time it really hurts is when it’s something that really matters to you. This can be anything in the significant areas of your life such as your career (a rejected job application in your dream company) or your love life (a not interested response after asking the love of your life to go out with you). So when you encounter situations like these again, what are you to do? Here are the steps that you should take.
- Cry it out. Let the after effects of the rejection sink in. Cry or be mad if you have to. Express all that anger and disappointment. You can do that in a healthy way through activities like talking to your friends about it, engaging in sports (such as running, swimming, or ping pong), and blogging or writing in your journal. Do anything healthy that will allow you to express your emotions. You can even scream to the top of your lungs at the top of a building where no one else can hear you. Scream out your feelings. You’ve seen it in movies, right? Well, try it out because it does work. After letting out some steam through screaming in the manner described, you will feel better and relieved.
- Accept. In order to avoid regret and more disappointments, you need some clarity. So, if the reason for rejection was not stated, ask the person who rejected you for their reasons. On a sheet of paper, write down the rejection and why you were rejected. Then, go through each item. Read them carefully, making sure you take in each reason and accept it. You didn’t get the position because someone else was more qualified. Accept that you did your best and it cannot be helped that you were rejected.
- Analyze the situation. Now that all the active emotions are out of your system and you’ve come to terms with why you were rejected, it’s time for you to be critical and objective about your rejection. Examine it without harboring any feelings of bitterness or regret. Just be critical and objective. That’s what you need right now. Look through the reasons and pinpoint which ones you think you can do something about. Surely there are things that you can improve on, so examine each of the reasons. If you need more details, don’t hesitate to ask the people who rejected you for more if they permit it. Then, think about what you can do to improve that part of you. Perhaps you can learn a new skill to become more eligible for hiring, or you need to do something about how you answer interviews. Write down what you come up with and then make plans for how to make the change. Set them as goals and slowly improve yourself.
Now, take note that each step takes some time to accomplish. So don’t rush and slow down. Also, the changes and improvements you planned will also take time to happen, so be patient in that field as well.